Americans enjoy three months of carefree vegging out before the responsibilities of fall programming resume, Herman Cain endorses who gives a fuck, and a pilot loses contact with '97.5 The River.' It's the week of June 18th, 2012. Subscribe to The Onion on YouTube: http://bit.ly/xzrBUA Like The Onion on Facebook: http://www.fb.com/theonion Follow The Onion on Twitter: http://www.twitter.com/theonion